Permissive Parenting: Examples, Characteristics, And Effects

Updated:June 25, 2025 | Published:December 17, 2024 | ByPamela Li

Permissive parenting (indulgent parenting) is characterized by a high level of responsiveness to a child’s needs and desires and a low level of demandingness and discipline. Parents who adopt the approach tend to be lenient and avoid setting firm boundaries or enforcing strict rules. The focus is creating a nurturing and emotionally supportive environment where children feel loved and free to express themselves. However, a permissive parenting style often leads to difficulties developing essential life skills, such as self-discipline and responsibility.

One of the defining characteristics of permissive parenting is the emphasis on warmth and emotional support. Permissive parents are involved in their children’s lives, offering comfort and reassurance whenever needed. They prioritize their child’s happiness and give in to their child’s demands to avoid conflict or maintain a positive relationship. The approach results in a relaxed household where children experience considerable freedom, but it means that essential rules and boundaries are not consistently enforced.

The effects of the permissive parenting style on children are positive and negative. Children raised in permissive households develop strong self-esteem, creativity, and independence as they are encouraged to explore their interests and make decisions. The lack of structure and discipline leads to challenges in some children, such as difficulties with self-regulation, respect for authority, and understanding the importance of boundaries. Children raised with permissive parenting struggle with impulse control and find it challenging to navigate environments where rules and expectations are more rigidly enforced.

What is a Permissive Parenting Style?

Permissive parenting (indulgent parenting) is characterized by a high level of responsiveness to children’s needs and desires but a low level of demandingness or control. Parents who adopt permissive parenting tend to be lenient, allowing their children to regulate their behavior and make decisions on their own. These parents are nurturing and communicative, offering warmth and affection, but they avoid enforcing strict rules or guidelines. Children raised in such environments experience much freedom in their daily lives as a result.

One of the defining aspects of permissive parenting is the tendency to avoid confrontation or discipline. Indulgent parenting is marked by a reluctance to set limits or enforce boundaries, leading to children’s struggle with self-regulation. Permissive parents do not provide the structure necessary for developing self-discipline and responsibility, while these parents quickly meet their children’s emotional needs. The permissive parenting style makes children less prepared to handle challenges or frustrations independently.

Psychologists express concern about permissive parenting’s long-term effects despite the good intentions behind it. Permissive parenting contributes to difficulties in social and academic settings in some children, while indulgent parenting fosters close parent-child relationships and creates a supportive environment. Children raised with minimal boundaries struggle to respect authority, follow rules, or cope with disappointment. Psychologists worry about its effectiveness in promoting well-rounded development.

What is the Importance of Understanding Permissive Parenting?

The importance of understanding permissive parenting is to shed light on the impact of child-rearing styles on a child’s development. Parenting styles play a significant role in shaping a child’s personality, behavior, and future relationships. Understanding the various approaches to parenting helps parents, educators, and caregivers make informed decisions that support children’s emotional, social, and cognitive development. Understanding these styles helps parents recognize the strengths and weaknesses of different methods, enabling the implementation of strategies that foster healthy growth and well-being in children.

Understanding the permissive parenting style is important because it highlights the consequences of a lack of structure and boundaries in a child’s upbringing. Permissive parenting is characterized by high responsiveness but low demandingness, where parents are indulgent and avoid setting limits. The approach leads to children developing a sense of entitlement, difficulty in self-regulation, and challenges in understanding and respecting authority. Permissive parenting aligns better with the goals and the development in a child when parents and caregivers understand its effects. Understanding the nuances of permissive parenting allows for more effective interventions and support systems to be implemented, ensuring that children receive the guidance they need to grow into well-rounded and responsible individuals.

Learning about permissive parenting and its effects on a child’s development helps parents create an environment that balances nurturing with necessary boundaries. A balanced parenting approach ensures that children are loved, supported, and equipped with the skills and discipline required to navigate the complexities of life. The knowledge of permissive parenting empowers parents and caregivers to make conscious choices that contribute to the well-being and success of the next generation.

What are the Examples of Permissive Parenting?

The Examples of Permissive Parenting are listed below.

• Lack of Enforced Bedtimes: A common example of permissive parenting is when parents allow their children to choose their bedtime. Permissive parents let their children stay up late instead of enforcing a consistent bedtime routine, even if it interferes with the child’s sleep needs. Children choosing their bedtimes often leads to inadequate rest, affecting their ability to concentrate and perform well in school.
• Avoidance of Discipline: A permissive parent avoids imposing consequences when a child misbehaves. For instance, a permissive parent gives in to the child’s demands to avoid conflict rather than addressing the behavior or setting boundaries if a child throws a tantrum in a store. It leads to a child developing poor impulse control and a lack of respect for authority.
• Unlimited Screen Time: Another example of indulgent parenting is when parents allow their children to spend excessive time on screens, such as watching TV, playing video games, or using smartphones, without setting limits. Permissive parents do not monitor or restrict the content or duration of screen time, which sometimes results in decreased physical activity, poor academic performance, and difficulties in social interactions.
• Permissive Eating Habits: Permissive parenting is seen in how parents handle their children’s eating habits. For example, a permissive parent allows their child to eat whatever they want, including unhealthy snacks and junk food, at any time of the day. The lack of structure around meals contributes to poor nutritional habits and potential health issues like obesity.
• Inconsistent Rules and Expectations: A hallmark of the permissive parenting style is the inconsistency in enforcing rules or expectations. For example, a parent occasionally sets a rule about chores or homework but then lets their child off the hook if they do not comply. The inconsistency needs to be clarified for the child to help them understand the importance of responsibility and accountability.

How does Permissive Parenting differ from other Parenting Styles?

Permissive parenting differs from other parenting styles by its unique approach to discipline, expectations, and the relationship between parent and child. Permissive parenting is characterized by a high level of responsiveness but a low level of demandingness among the four parenting styles. The four parenting styles are authoritarian, authoritative, permissive, and uninvolved, according to a 2021 study from Israel titled “Parenting as a Communication Process: Integrating Interpersonal Communication Theory and Parenting Styles Conceptualization,” conducted by Roi Estlein at University of Haifa and published in the Journal of Family Theory & Review.

The permissive parenting type is lenient. Parents avoid strict rules and allow children considerable freedom to make their own choices. Permissive parents tend to focus more on being a friend to their child rather than an authority figure, unlike other parenting types.

Permissive parenting takes a starkly different approach compared to the authoritarian style. Authoritarian parents are demanding and have strict rules and expectations, enforcing discipline through punishment. Authoritarian parents emphasize obedience and control, with less emphasis on nurturing or responsiveness. Permissive parents rarely enforce rules or set boundaries, prioritizing their child’s happiness and autonomy over discipline and structure. The difference leads to varied outcomes in child development, with children under authoritarian parenting styles becoming more obedient but possibly less socially adept. Parents under permissive parenting struggle with self-regulation and respect for authority.

The permissive parenting style lacks the structure and clear expectations that characterize the authoritative parenting style, which is considered the most balanced and effective of the four parenting styles. Authoritative parents combine high responsiveness with high demandingness, setting clear rules while being open to communication and flexibility. They encourage independence but within well-defined limits, promoting a child’s emotional and social development. Permissive parenting offers warmth and nurturing but without the consistent boundaries that help children develop self-discipline and a sense of responsibility.

Permissive parenting is more engaged but lacks the necessary structure compared to the uninvolved style. Uninvolved parents (neglectful parents) are neither responsive nor demanding. They are detached from their children’s lives, providing little guidance, support, or attention. Permissive parents are involved and caring, but their failure to set limits contrasts sharply with the neglectful nature of uninvolved parents. The difference means that children in permissive homes receive more emotional support than parents in uninvolved homes, but they face challenges due to the lack of boundaries and expectations.

Understanding how permissive parenting differs from other parenting styles helps parents recognize its impact on a child’s development. Each of the four parenting styles offers different methods of interacting with and guiding children, leading to diverse outcomes in their academic success, behavior, emotional health, and social skills.

What are the Characteristics of Permissive Parenting?

The characteristics of permissive parenting refer to the specific behaviors, attitudes, and practices that define how permissive parents interact with their children. These characteristics are distinctive features that distinguish the permissive parenting style from other parenting approaches. The characteristics of permissive parenting are listed below.

1. Expressing Warmth Toward Children: Permissive parents are affectionate and nurturing, showing their children love and attention. They prioritize maintaining a close, emotionally supportive relationship with their children.
2. Providing Support to Children’s Needs: Permissive parents quickly respond to their children’s needs and desires, going out of their way to ensure their comfort and happiness. They are attentive and prioritize their child’s immediate well-being.
3. Lacking in Structure: Permissive parents tend to have a relaxed approach to rules and routines. The household has little to no structure, which leads to a lack of consistency in the child’s daily life.
4. Having Few Rules: There are few rules or guidelines that children are expected to follow in permissive parenting. The parent avoids setting strict boundaries or enforcing discipline, leading to an environment where children have significant freedom.
5. Having Low Expectations for Children: Permissive parents have low expectations regarding their child’s behavior and responsibilities. They do not require their children to adhere to specific standards, such as completing chores or following a regular study routine.
6. Providing Little Guidance for Children in Decision-Making: Permissive parents allow their children to make decisions without much guidance or direction. It results in children lacking the ability to make well-considered choices, as they do not have the necessary support to evaluate the consequences of their actions.
7. Failing to Hold Limits by Giving in to Children’s Requests: Permissive parents give in to their children’s demands, even when it goes against their better judgment. The inability to enforce limits leads to a lack of respect for authority and difficulty in understanding the importance of boundaries.
8. Having Inability to Say “No” to Children: The hallmark characteristic of permissive parenting is the parent’s difficulty in saying “no” to their children. It stems from a desire to avoid conflict and to keep the child happy at the expense of discipline and structure.
9. Having No Consequences for Bad Behavior: There are few consequences for misbehavior in permissive households. Permissive parents overlook or excuse bad behavior, believing their child learns from experience without needing punishment or correction.
10. Prioritizing Being Liked by Children over Limit-Setting: Permissive parents prioritize liking or accepting their children over setting necessary limits. They fear enforcing rules or saying “no” harms their relationship with the child, leading them to avoid difficult decisions involving discipline.

1. Expressing Warmth toward Children

Expressing warmth toward children refers to the display of affection, love, and emotional support that parents provide to their children. The characteristic is marked by an emphasis on creating a nurturing and emotionally secure environment in the context of permissive parenting. Permissive parents prioritize their child’s emotional comfort and well-being, making sure their child feels valued and cared for. The warmth manifests in various ways, such as through physical affection, verbal affirmations, and attentive listening.

Expressing warmth is a fundamental way for permissive parents to build a close and trusting relationship with their children. These parents are responsive to their child’s emotional needs and are quick to offer comfort, encouragement, and validation. Parents’ warmth aims to foster a strong bond between parent and child, ensuring the child feels loved and supported. However, the warmth is provided without the balance of firm boundaries or consistent discipline in permissive parenting, leading to potential challenges in the child’s development.

For example, permissive parents respond to their children’s distress by immediately offering comfort or indulging their desires, such as buying a toy to cheer them up when upset. They express their love and admiration verbally, telling their child how proud they are or how much they mean to them. These actions are coupled with a reluctance to set limits or enforce rules, which results in the child becoming overly dependent on external validation and lacking in self-discipline.

Expressing warmth toward children in permissive parenting involves a deep commitment to making the child feel loved and emotionally secure. However, it is not accompanied by the necessary structure and boundaries that help children learn self-regulation and responsibility, while warmth is crucial for healthy emotional development in permissive parenting.

2. Providing Support to Children’s needs

Supporting children’s needs involves responding to their physical, emotional, and psychological requirements as they grow and develop. The support is characterized by a high level of attentiveness and responsiveness to whatever the child expresses as a need or desire. Permissive parents are accommodating, ensuring that their child’s immediate needs and wants are met at the expense of teaching the child how to navigate challenges independently.

Providing support works by focusing on fulfilling the child’s desires in a way that emphasizes their comfort and happiness in permissive parenting. Permissive parents go to great lengths to ensure that their children do not experience discomfort, frustration, or disappointment. They provide everything the child asks for, such as material goods, emotional reassurance, or leniency in rules. The type of support is well-intentioned, as the parents wish to create a positive and stress-free environment for their child. However, the overemphasis on meeting immediate needs leads to a lack of resilience and self-reliance in the child.

For example, permissive parents complete the work rather than encourage the child to try to figure it out independently. It ensures that the child does not feel frustrated or stressed but prevents the child from learning problem-solving skills and developing perseverance. Another example is a parent who consistently provides their child with their favorite foods, regardless of nutritional value, to keep the child happy and avoid conflict.

Permissive parenting involves high responsiveness and care in supporting children’s needs. Permissive parents prioritize their child’s immediate comfort and satisfaction. The support creates a loving and nurturing environment but hinders the child’s ability to develop important life skills, such as self-discipline, problem-solving, and resilience.

3. Lacking in Structure

Lacking structure refers to the absence of consistent rules, routines, and expectations in a child’s environment. The lack of structure is a defining characteristic of permissive parenting, where permissive parents avoid setting clear guidelines or enforcing regular routines. The household is characterized by flexibility and spontaneity, with few established rules the child is expected to follow. The approach creates an environment where the child has considerable freedom but little direction or consistency.

The lack of structure allows children to make many choices and decisions without the guidance or constraints bound by other parenting styles. Permissive parents believe that giving their children this level of freedom encourages independence and creativity. However, children struggle to understand boundaries, develop self-discipline, or manage their time effectively without structure. The absence of clear expectations leads to confusion, insecurity, and a lack of preparation for situations that require responsibility and adherence to rules.

For example, a child has no set bedtime in a household where permissive parents are lacking in structure. The children are allowed to stay up as late as they want instead of adhering to a regular sleep schedule, which results in irregular sleep patterns and difficulties with concentration and behavior the next day. Another example is the absence of rules regarding screen time, where the child is free to watch television or play video games for extended periods without any limits or supervision. It impacts the child’s physical health, academic performance, and social interactions.

Lack of structure in permissive parenting involves a flexible, unregulated approach to daily life. Permissive parents provide their children with freedom but little guidance or consistency. The result is a relaxed, pressure-free environment, but it prevents children from developing important life skills like time management, self-discipline, and self-awareness.

4. Having Few Rules

Having few rules refers to the minimal presence of guidelines or expectations governing a child’s behavior in their daily life. Not setting rules or limits is prevalent in permissive parenting, as permissive parents choose not to impose strict rules or boundaries on their children. The belief behind the approach is that fewer rules allow children more freedom to explore, express themselves, and make their own decisions without the constraints of rigid expectations. However, it leads to an environment where the child lacks direction or understanding of acceptable behavior.

Having few rules creates a household dynamic where children largely control their actions and decisions in permissive parenting. Permissive parents avoid setting rules because they want to maintain a harmonious relationship with their children, fearing that enforcing rules leads to conflict or resentment. These parents rely on gentle suggestions or allow the child to decide what is best for them instead of laying down clear guidelines. It results in children not learning important lessons about responsibility, respect for others, and the consequences of their actions, while the approach is intended to foster independence and self-expression.

For example, a child is not required to do chores or help around the house in a household where permissive parents have few rules. The parent believes that the child must focus on play and enjoyment rather than taking on responsibilities. The belief leads to the child lacking an understanding of the importance of contributing to the household or developing a sense of responsibility. Another example is the absence of rules around homework, where the child is free to complete their schoolwork whenever they choose without any parental enforcement or consequences. It negatively affects the child’s academic performance and work habits.

Having few rules in the context of permissive parenting means that permissive parents opt for a lenient approach, providing their children with considerable freedom but little structure or guidance. Creating an environment where the child feels free to express themselves and explore results in a lack of discipline, respect for boundaries, and understanding of the responsibilities of growing up.

5. Having Low Expectations for Children

Having low expectations for children refers to a parenting approach in which parents do not set high standards or demand much from their children regarding behavior, responsibilities, or achievements. This characteristic is common in permissive parenting, as permissive parents choose not to place significant demands on their children. They believe that lowering expectations reduces pressure on the child and allows them to develop at their own pace. However, it leads to children not reaching their full potential or lacking the motivation to strive for higher goals.

Low expectations create an environment where children are not pushed to meet specific standards or achieve particular milestones. Permissive parents avoid imposing expectations because they fear it causes stress or frustration for the child. They allow the child to set their own pace in academics, household responsibilities, and social behavior. The approach reduces stress and promotes a more relaxed atmosphere but hinders children’s development of important skills such as perseverance, self-discipline, and goal-setting.

For example, a child is not encouraged to complete their homework or study for tests in a household where permissive parents have low expectations. The parent feels the child must be free to learn at their own pace and not be burdened with academic pressure. The child does not develop strong study habits or a sense of responsibility toward their education, which impacts their academic performance and future opportunities. Another example is household chores, where the child is not expected to contribute to the upkeep of the home. The parents believe that chores are too demanding or unnecessary, leading to the child not learning important life skills related to responsibility and cooperation.

Having low expectations for children in the context of permissive parenting means that permissive parents do not place significant demands on their children, opting instead for a more relaxed and hands-off approach. Children achieve their full potential and successfully navigate challenges in a stress-free environment in the short term but lack motivation, discipline, and skills to succeed.

6. Providing Little Guidance for Children in Decision Making

Providing little guidance for children in decision-making refers to a parenting approach where parents offer minimal input or direction when their children are faced with choices or decisions. The characteristic is evident as permissive parents allow their children to make decisions without much parental involvement or advice in permissive parenting. The underlying belief in the approach is that by giving children the freedom to choose, they learn independence and develop confidence in their abilities to navigate life’s challenges independently.

Providing little guidance works by placing the responsibility for decision-making mainly in the hands of the child in permissive parenting. Permissive parents feel that intervening or offering too much guidance stifles their child’s autonomy or creativity. They refrain from giving advice, setting limits, or suggesting alternatives, even when faced with situations where the child benefits from adult input. Children lack the experience or knowledge to make sound decisions because the permissive approach leads to confusion or poor decision-making.

For example, permissive parents do not guide prioritizing time spent on homework versus playing video games. They simply allow the child to decide without discussing the potential consequences of neglecting their schoolwork. The lack of guidance results in the child making choices that focus more on immediate gratification than long-term benefits. Another example is when a child faces a social dilemma, such as choosing between different friend groups. Permissive parents avoid offering advice on the qualities of a good friend or the importance of healthy relationships, leaving the child to navigate these complex social dynamics alone.

Permissive parenting involves providing little guidance for children in decision-making. Permissive parents allow their children to make choices independently, with minimal parental input. The approach fosters independence but results in poor decision-making and missed opportunities to learn valuable lessons. Children have difficulty making choices that are in their best interest or considering the long-term implications without adequate guidance.

7. Failing to Hold Limits by Giving in to Children’s Requests

Failing to hold limits by giving in to children’s requests refers to parents setting boundaries or rules but relenting when their children push back or make demands. Inconsistent rule enforcement is common in permissive parenting, as permissive parents struggle to enforce their established limits. They give in to their child’s requests to avoid conflict or keep them happy instead of maintaining consistency, even if it compromises the initial set of rules.

The behavior works by creating a dynamic where the child learns that persistence or emotional displays, such as whining or tantrums, lead to the parent relenting. Permissive parents initially set a rule, such as limiting screen time or insisting on completing homework before play, but when the child resists or becomes upset, the parent chooses to give in rather than enforce the rule. The approach leads to a cycle where the child pushes boundaries, knowing that the parent is likely to give in, weakening the effectiveness of any rules or limits the parent tries to establish.

For example, a permissive parent sets their child’s bedtime at 8:30 p.m. However, the parent says no but eventually allows it when the child asks to stay up later to watch a TV show or play a game, fearing that denying the request leads to a meltdown or conflict. The inconsistency teaches the child that limits are negotiable and that persistence leads to getting what they want, undermining the parent’s authority and the effectiveness of any future rules.

Another example is in the context of diet and nutrition. A permissive parent establishes a rule that the child must eat a balanced meal before having dessert. However, the parent gives in and allows dessert anyway to avoid an argument or to make the child happy if the child complains or refuses to eat. It disrupts the child’s understanding of healthy eating habits and communicates that the rules are flexible and bent with enough pressure.

Failing to hold limits by giving in to children’s requests is a key characteristic of permissive parenting, where permissive parents set rules or boundaries but compromise them when faced with their child’s resistance. The problem with the indulgent approach is that it leads to short-term happiness and peace but teaches children that boundaries are not strict and that persistence pays off. Developing self-discipline, respecting rules, and understanding limits are challenging in children with indulgent parents.

8. Having Inability to say “No” to Children

Having an inability to say “No” to children refers to a parenting behavior where parents consistently struggle to deny their children’s requests, even when it is in the child’s best interest to do so. The characteristic of permissive parenting is prevalent, as permissive parents prioritize the happiness and security of their children over setting boundaries or enforcing discipline. The reluctance to say “no” stems from a desire to avoid conflict, maintain a positive relationship, or prevent the child from experiencing disappointment or frustration.

A child feels that their desires are always met using permissive parenting, regardless of circumstances, because the parent is unable to say “no.” A permissive parent feels guilty or has difficulty asserting their authority. They acquiesce to the child’s demands for material possessions, extra privileges, or leniency in rules. The approach achieves short-term satisfaction, but long-term challenges arise when children lack self-control, respect authority, and understand limits.

For example, a permissive parent finds it challenging to say “no” when their child asks for a new toy, even if they already have plenty of toys or if the request is financially unreasonable. The parent fears that denying the request makes the child upset or unloved, so they give in, reinforcing the child’s belief that their wants are fulfilled. It results in the child developing a sense of entitlement or an expectation that their desires must always prioritized.

Another example is related to discipline. Suppose a child insists on skipping school to attend a social event. A permissive parent struggling to say “no” allows it despite knowing it is not academically in the child’s best interest. The inability to deny the child’s request in the situation undermine the importance of education and responsibility, leading the child to believe that rules are flexible and that their preferences must take precedence.

The inability to say “no” to children is a key characteristic of permissive parenting, where permissive parents give in to their child’s demands to avoid conflict or disappointment. Having no rules creates challenges in the child’s development by fostering a lack of respect for boundaries, which leads to a harmonious relationship in the short term. Authority and the understanding that not all desires must be met.

9. Having No Consequences for Bad Behavior

Having no consequences for bad behavior refers to a parenting approach where parents do not impose discipline or repercussions when their child engages in inappropriate or unacceptable behavior. A permissive parent overlooks or excuses their child’s misbehavior instead of dealing with it. The belief behind the approach is that by avoiding punishment or negative feedback, the child feels more supported and less criticized, fostering a more positive relationship between parent and child. However, the lack of discipline leads to difficulties in the child’s understanding of acceptable behavior boundaries.

The absence of consequences for bad behavior in permissive parenting creates an environment in which a child is not linked to any negative consequences for their actions. Permissive parents feel that imposing consequences damage their relationship with their child or cause the child emotional distress. They refrain from using time-outs, losing privileges, or other disciplinary measures. The purpose of the approach is to keep children happy and maintain a peaceful home, but it inadvertently teaches them that their actions have no consequences, which leads to a lack of understanding of right and wrong.

For example, a permissive parent ignores a child’s behavior when they speak back to them or asks them to be nicer next time without enforcing any consequences. The child repeats the behavior since the child does not learn that such actions are inappropriate or carry penalties. A child struggles with authority figures or social situations requiring more structured behavior over time.

Another example involves a child consistently refusing to do their homework or chores. Permissive parents avoid addressing the behavior in any way of consequence, such as limiting screen time or requiring the work to be completed before play. The child continues with their preferred activity, reinforcing that their responsibilities are optional. Poor work habits and a lack of accountability negatively impact a child’s academic and personal development.

Having no consequences for bad behavior is a defining characteristic of permissive parenting, where permissive parents choose not to impose disciplinary measures in response to their child’s misbehavior. A more harmonious relationship is cultivated in the short term with the approach. However, permissive parenting style negatively affects a child’s ability to understand boundaries, respect authority, and differentiate acceptable and unacceptable behavior over the long run.

10. Prioritizing being Liked by Children over Limit-Setting

Prioritizing being liked by children over limit-setting refers to a parenting behavior where parents focus more on maintaining a positive and friendly relationship with their child rather than enforcing rules or boundaries. A permissive parent emphasizes the characteristic above all else, even if it means compromising on discipline or structure, as they value their child’s approval and happiness above all else. The desire to be seen as a friend or an ally rather than an authority figure drives these parents to avoid setting or enforcing limits, which have significant implications for the child’s development.

Prioritizing being liked works by creating an environment where the parent-child relationship is centered on harmony and mutual affection at the expense of necessary boundaries. Permissive parents fear that enforcing rules or saying “no” leads to conflict, resentment, or a strain on their relationship with their child. They choose to give in to their child’s demands, avoid setting strict rules, or overlook misbehavior, all to maintain a peaceful and affectionate bond. Positive relationships in the short term lead to long-term issues, as the child does not learn the importance of limits, responsibility, or respect for authority.

For example, a permissive parent allows their child to eat whatever they want, whenever they want, to avoid the potential conflict of enforcing a healthy diet. The parents feel that allowing the child to make their own choices supports them and fosters independence. However, the lack of limit-setting leads to poor eating habits and health issues, as the child has yet to learn the importance of balanced nutrition or self-control.

Another example is in the context of discipline. A permissive parent hesitates to impose consequences if a child repeatedly violates a household rule, like staying up too late or failing to complete chores, because they do not want to upset the child. Parents believe that being lenient maintains their child’s affection and trust. However, the approach leads to the child needing to take rules seriously, which affects their behavior in other areas of life, such as school or social interactions.

Permissive parenting prioritizes being liked by children over limit-setting. A permissive parent places more importance on being their child’s friend than an authority figure. The approach fosters a close and loving relationship. It leads to a conflict of discipline, boundaries, and respect for rules, essential for the child’s development and ability to navigate life’s challenges effectively.

What is the Effect of Permissive Parenting?

The effect of permissive parenting is significant in shaping a child’s behavior, emotional well-being, and social development. Studies showing the positive and negative impacts of indulgent parenting on child development have mixed results.

The negative effects of permissive parenting manifest in some children’s inability to establish self-discipline, leading to difficulties in managing impulses and emotions. Some children raised under the permissive parenting style struggle with boundaries without the guidance of consistent rules and expectations. Children find it challenging to respect authority or adhere to social norms, leading to behavioral issues at home and school, where rules and structure are more rigidly enforced.

The development of poor self-regulation is another primary negative effect in children. Children do not learn to delay gratification or cope with frustration because permissive parents avoid setting limits or enforcing consequences. It results in impulsive behavior, where the child acts on their desires without considering the consequences. These children find it difficult to manage their emotions effectively in the long term, leading to challenges in personal relationships and academic or professional environments.

Another adverse effect of permissive parenting is the potential for children to develop a sense of entitlement. The child comes to expect their wishes to be fulfilled when parents give in to their child’s demands to avoid conflict or keep them happy. The sense of entitlement leads to difficulties in social interactions as the child struggles to understand the importance of compromise and cooperation. The lack of boundaries set by permissive parents results in children having unrealistic expectations of how others must treat them, which causes frustration and disappointment as they grow older and encounter more structured environments.

The adverse effects of permissive parenting extend to a child’s academic performance. Children develop a lax attitude toward their responsibilities without consistent expectations or encouragement to complete tasks like homework or studying. It leads to poor academic outcomes, as the child does not prioritize their education or develop the necessary study habits to succeed. The absence of structure in a permissive household hinders a child’s ability to set goals and work toward achieving them, affecting their long-term success.

The positive effects of permissive parenting include better self-esteem, stronger parent-child relationships, higher creativity, social skills, and socio-emotional skills. Children with permissive parents are found to develop secure attachments due to parents’ responsiveness, according to a 2011 study from Iran titled “The mediational pathway among parenting styles, attachment styles and self-regulation with addiction susceptibility of adolescents,” by Parviz Asgari et al., published in the Journal of Research in Medical Sciences: the Official Journal of Isfahan University of Medical Sciences.

The adverse impacts of permissive parenting have a lasting effect on a child’s ability to navigate the complexities of life. The lack of structure and discipline leads to challenges in self-regulation, social interactions, and academic achievement, while the warmth and responsiveness of permissive parents provide emotional support. Understanding these effects is crucial for parents and caregivers aiming to foster a balanced environment that promotes emotional well-being and responsible behavior.

What are the Positive Effects of Permissive Parenting in Children?

The Positive Effects of Permissive Parenting in Children are listed below.

• High Self-Esteem: Children of permissive parents develop strong self-worth and confidence. Permissive parenting provides continuous praise, encouragement, and positive reinforcement. These children feel valued and accepted for who they are, which helps build their self-esteem. The absence of harsh criticism or strict rules allows them to explore their identities without fear of judgment, fostering a healthy self-image.
• Strong Parent-Child Bond: One of the positive effects of permissive parenting is the close and affectionate relationship between parent and child. Permissive parenting emphasizes emotional warmth, open communication, and mutual respect, strengthening the bond between the two. The strong connection gives children a sense of security and trust, knowing their parents are always there to support and love them unconditionally.
• Creativity and Independence: Children of permissive parents are encouraged to express themselves freely, enhancing creativity and independence. Permissive parenting allows children to explore their interests, make their own choices, and think outside the box without the constraints of rigid rules or expectations. The freedom fosters innovation and a strong sense of autonomy as children learn to rely on their judgment and creativity.
• Good Social Skills: Good social skills are one of the advantages of permissive parenting, which develops solid social skills because permissive parenting involves high responsiveness and communication. Permissive parenting encourages children to express their thoughts and feelings openly, translating into better interpersonal relationships. These children become adept at understanding and empathizing with others as they have been raised in an environment that values emotional expression and connection.
• Emotional Intelligence: Permissive parenting leads to children’s emotional intelligence development. Permissive parents are attuned to their children’s emotions and encourage them to explore and understand their feelings. A focus on emotional awareness and expression helps children develop the ability to recognize, understand, and manage their own emotions and empathize with others.

What are the Negative Impacts of Permissive Parenting on Children?

The Negative Impacts of Permissive Parenting on Children are listed below.

• Lack of Self-Discipline: Children need more consistent rules and expectations to develop self-discipline. Permissive parenting fails to enforce boundaries or consequences, and children do not learn to regulate their behavior or delay gratification. They find it challenging to manage impulses, follow through on tasks, or maintain focus in school and other aspects of life.
• Poor Social Skills: Children of permissive parents develop better social skills with clear guidelines on appropriate behavior. Permissive parenting is caused by not teaching children the importance of respecting others’ boundaries, sharing, or cooperating in group settings. These children struggle with authority figures, have difficulty making friends, or face challenges in understanding social norms, leading to potential issues in peer relationships.
• Entitlement: The common disadvantage of permissive parenting leads to a sense of entitlement in children. Children grow up expecting that their parents always fulfill their wishes if they consistently give in to their demands and never say “no.” The result is that they perceive themselves as entitled to special treatment, which makes it difficult to cooperate and compromise in social settings.
• Academic Challenges: Permissive parenting lacks structure and expectations, which leads to academic challenges for the child. Children of permissive parents must develop stronger study habits or a sense of responsibility for their education. They stay caught up academically and improve with organization and time management with the encouragement to complete homework or prioritize schoolwork.
• Difficulty with Authority: Children of permissive parents have trouble respecting authority due to the lenient approach of their upbringing. Permissive parenting is caused by the failure to establish a clear hierarchy or rules the child must follow. These children resist rules and authority figures, such as teachers or employers, leading to conflicts and difficulties in structured environments.

Why do Parents choose Permissive Parenting?

Parents choose permissive parenting because they prioritize their child’s happiness and emotional well-being over strict rules and discipline. Parents who adopt a permissive style believe that being lenient and indulgent creates a more positive and nurturing environment for their children. They wish to avoid the conflicts and stress of enforcing rules, thinking the approach fosters a closer, more harmonious relationship with their child. The desire to be a friend rather than an authority figure often drives parents to choose a permissive approach, believing it encourages open communication and trust.

Another reason parents choose permissive parenting is due to their own upbringing or personal experiences. Some parents who were raised in strict or authoritarian households consciously decide to avoid a similar approach with their children. Indulgent parents associate discipline with harshness or emotional distance and thus opt for a more lenient style to ensure their children feel loved and supported. Some permissive parents lack confidence in their ability to enforce rules or feel uncomfortable with imposing authority, leading them to adopt a permissive approach to maintain a peaceful and stress-free home environment.

Cultural and societal influences play a role in why parents choose permissive parenting. Some cultures or communities emphasize individuality and personal freedom, which leads parents to embrace a more permissive style. They believe allowing children to express themselves freely and make their own choices is essential for developing independence and self-confidence. The modern parenting landscape, focusing on positive reinforcement and child-centered approaches, encourages permissive tendencies, as parents feel pressure to avoid being too controlling or authoritarian.

Some permissive parents choose permissive parenting because of time constraints or fatigue. Busy schedules and the demands of work or other responsibilities make it challenging for parents to consistently enforce rules or monitor their child’s behavior. Parents resort to a more permissive style, allowing their children more freedom simply because it requires less time and effort. Single parents or parents dealing with stressful circumstances where the energy needed to establish and maintain boundaries are in short supply choose a permissive parenting style.

How To Change if a Parent is Permissive?

To change if a parent is permissive, follow the steps listed below.

• Set Rules for the Children to Follow: Establish clear, consistent rules the children are expected to follow. It helps create structure and boundaries, which are essential for developing discipline and responsibility.
• Communicate Your Expectations: Communicate the expectations to the children. Let them know what behaviors are acceptable and what is expected of them in various situations.
• Stick to Your Limits: Enforce boundaries consistently once a parent sets rules and boundaries. Avoid giving in to pressure or negotiating limits, as giving in undermines authority.
• Reward Good Behaviors: Encourage positive behaviors by rewarding them. Praise, extra privileges, or other incentives reinforce good behavior and adherence to rules.
• Guide Children Through Making Decisions: Help the children make decisions by providing guidance and support rather than allowing them to navigate choices entirely on their own. The approach helps them learn critical thinking and decision-making skills.
• Make Sure Your Kids Understand the Penalty of Breaking the Rules: Clearly outline the consequences and ensure the children understand these penalties. Consistently enforcing these consequences helps children learn accountability.
• Maintain Authority as a Parent: Assert your role as a parent by maintaining authority in the household. This means being firm when necessary and not shying away from making difficult decisions in the child’s best interest.

How Can Therapy Help a Permissive Parent?

Therapy can help a permissive parent by providing the tools and strategies to establish healthier boundaries and more effective discipline techniques. Permissive parents better understand their parenting style through therapy, including the reasons for their permissiveness. A therapist helps the parent explore any experiences, beliefs, or fears influencing their parenting approach. Self-awareness is crucial, allowing the parent to recognize patterns and behaviors that do not serve their child’s best interests. The parent begins making more informed choices about balancing nurturing with the necessary structure with the insight.

A permissive parent learns practical skills for setting boundaries and enforcing rules in a manageable and effective way in therapy. Therapists guide parents in developing clear, consistent expectations for their children while maintaining a warm and supportive relationship. It includes role-playing scenarios, creating behavior plans, or practicing communication techniques that encourage cooperation without resorting to harshness. A permissive parent builds confidence in their ability to assert authority and constructively manage their child’s behavior by working with a therapist.

Therapy helps a permissive parent address any guilt or anxiety they feel about being more assertive or disciplined. Permissive parents struggle with the fear of damaging their relationship with their child or causing emotional harm by enforcing rules. A therapist offers support and reassurance, helping the parent to see that setting limits is a necessary part of parenting that strengthens the parent-child bond. Parents learn to distinguish between healthy discipline and punitive measures through therapy, understanding that boundaries are essential for a child’s development and well-being.

Therapy provides a space for permissive parents to explore alternative parenting strategies that align with their values while promoting better outcomes for their children. For instance, a therapist introduces concepts from authoritative parenting, which combines responsiveness with appropriate demands. A permissive parent maintains a nurturing approach while fostering responsibility, self-discipline, and respect for authority in their child by integrating style elements. The balanced approach produces more positive long-term effects on the child’s behavior and emotional health.

Therapy helps permissive parents by offering insight into their parenting style, equipping them with practical tools for setting boundaries, and providing emotional support as they make necessary changes. Permissive parents create a more structured and supportive environment that benefits their children and themselves by working with a therapist.

How Common is Permissive Parenting?

Permissive parenting is used by approximately 14% to 25% of parents in the United States, according to a 2010 study titled “Authoritarian Parenting and Asian Adolescent School Performance: Insights from the US and Taiwan,” by Suet-ling Pong et al., published in International journal of behavioral development. Permissive parenting is prevalent in Western cultures, with an increasing emphasis on child-centered approaches and the importance of fostering creativity and independence. Permissive parenting remains a significant approach many parents use, although it is not the most prevalent style. Indulgent parenting is more prevalent among parents who prioritize emotional closeness and fear that strict rules or discipline damage their relationship with their children.

The relationship between permissive parenting prevalence and socioeconomic status (SES) shows conflicting results in studies. Permissive parenting is found mainly in parents in the low socio-economic group, according to a 2016 study from South Africa titled “The role of parenting styles and socio-economic status in parents’ knowledge of child development,” conducted by Nicolette Vanessa Roman et al. at the University of the Western Cape and published in Early Child Development and Care. However, permissive parents are more prevalent in higher-income families, according to a 2013 study titled “Trajectories of BMI from early childhood through early adolescence: SES and psychosocial predictors,” by Sean Lane et al., published in the British Journal of Health Psychology. Higher-SES parents have more resources and time to devote to their children, leading to a more indulgent approach and environments emphasizing personal freedom and self-expression.

Another study, published in Parenting: Science and Practice, examined the prevalence of different parenting styles across various cultures and found that permissive parenting was more common in Western cultures compared to Asian or African cultures. Asian or African cultures are authoritarian styles that tend to dominate. The cultural variance suggests that individual parental preferences and broader societal values and norms influence permissive parenting.

Does Permissive Parenting Prioritize Freedom over Discipline?

Yes, permissive parenting prioritizes freedom over discipline. Permissive parenting is characterized by a high level of responsiveness and warmth toward the child but with low demandingness and structure. Permissive parents focus on giving their children the freedom to make their own choices and express themselves without strict rules or guidelines. The emphasis is on nurturing the child’s independence and emotional well-being, sometimes at the expense of enforcing discipline or setting clear boundaries. Children experience great freedom in their actions and decisions but miss out on learning self-control, responsibility, and respect for authority if they do not receive consistent discipline.

Can Permissive Parenting Cause Mental Illness?

Yes, permissive parenting can cause mental illness. Permissive parenting contributes to the development of mental illness in children, though it is not the sole cause. The lack of structure, boundaries, and consistent discipline in permissive parenting leads to emotional and behavioral issues that increase the risk of mental health problems. Certain mental illnesses develop in children when there is no clear guidance and limits to help them cope with stress and challenges.

Three major mental illnesses that are linked to the effects of permissive parenting include anxiety disorders, depression, and conduct disorder. Children raised in a permissive environment experience heightened anxiety due to a lack of structure and predictability in their lives. The absence of clear boundaries makes them feel insecure and uncertain, leading to excessive worry and fear.

The lack of discipline and consistent support in permissive parenting contribute to feelings of inadequacy and low self-esteem in children. They struggle with feelings of helplessness when children do not receive the necessary guidance and support to develop self-control and responsibility, which leads to depression. Permissive parenting increases the risk of conduct disorder, where children exhibit a pattern of disruptive and aggressive behavior. The absence of clear rules and consequences leads to difficulties in managing impulses and understanding social norms, resulting in behavioral issues that escalate into more serious problems. It creates an environment that contributes to their development by failing to provide emotional and behavioral guidance, while permissive parenting alone does not directly cause these mental illnesses.

Is Permissive Parenting the same as Gentle Parenting?

No, permissive parenting is not the same as gentle parenting. Permissive and gentle parenting are not the same, although they share similarities in their emphasis on emotional support and avoiding harsh discipline. Permissive parenting is characterized by a lack of structure, few rules, and a tendency to give in to a child’s demands at the expense of setting boundaries and enforcing discipline. They prioritize their child’s happiness over teaching responsibility and self-control, leading to potential child development challenges.

Gentle parenting focuses on empathy, respect, and understanding, emphasizing the need to set clear boundaries and guide children through their emotions and behaviors constructively. The purpose of gentle parenting is to teach children the importance of limits and consequences compassionately, unlike permissive parenting. Gentle parents aim to discipline without punishment, using positive reinforcement, problem-solving, and open communication to help children develop self-regulation and social skills.